Journey To The End Of Night
Adventures in Active Addiction and Recovery — A Philosophical Perspective

It’s been awhile….

Wow… It’s damn near one year since I last looked at this blog.  To those who inquired — (if you’re still checking in now and again) — yes, I’m fine, still going strong.  Just been sidetracked by health problems and school, excruciating convergence disorder headache and eyestrain kept me from the computer and mononucleosis laid me flat out for a few months.  Surely, if there be gods, then all of them conspired against me this semester.  Albeit unsuccessfully, as I’ll be completing it with straight A’s and in better physical condition than it began.

Whatever doesn’t kill me truly does make me stronger ( Getting bored with the literature?  too dry?  Pick up Nietzsche or Schopenhauer.  Nietzsche is dificult.  Schopenhauer is often complex.  However, there is a reason stupid people are always being told to ‘keep it simple”. I garuntee you a careful reading of these guys will definitely change your life.

’round the end of last summer, I realized NA/AA had served its purpose for me ( I don’t buy the ‘addiction is a lifelong process’ bullshit.  To that I say, “Twelve step groups are a stepping stone”.  To what?  Back to a life with a fulfilling direction.) and shifted my focus back to school.  In the mid 90’s I earned a degree in Philosophy and Psychology then went (briefly) on to Graduate school in philosophy and even served as a teaching assistant for a couple semesters.  Even back then it was a toss up between academia and computer programming.  Even as I was growing disillusioned with the way philosophy is taught in American Universities these days, the chronic pain condition that led to my addiction was worsening and I left grad work after finishing just one year.  Pain and addiction got in the way of any progress on the programming front until last April.  Off the drugs, I felt (and feel) as if I’ve gained about 150 IQ points.  My mind is really that much clearer, sharper, crisper, cleaner, focused, concentrated.  What I have now is what I always sought in dextroamphetamine and ritalin and adderall tablets.  Anways, back to the point — so I picked up a couple books on Flash Actionscript 3.0 programming and excitedly realized that learning this stuff — an absolute intellectual impossibility on the drugs and with the pain — was not so tough after all.  Three months later I was creating small game demos in that language.  In the interim I’ve picked up Python on my own and just completed classes in Java programming and html/css.  I’ll be tackling C++ at school over the summer and with some effort ought to be able to pick up a Java certification within a few months, then finally — provided tyrant in Chief Obama doesn’t complete dismantle the economy and the internet by then — an internship or job in the field I wished I’d entered twenty, even twenty five, years ago.  

So thats in short what I’ve been up to.

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One Response to “It’s been awhile….”

  1. Thanks for the link to melancholymagick.com. I too have had my civil liberties violated by both the Bush AND Obama administrations but was completely unaware of just how deep the shit we’re in is. They want to regulate speech, web, radio, business, everything…


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